nannyslayer
New Member
Well, since this late shed buck season is in, I decided to take advantage of it and yesterday I killed a big ole shed bu……….. uh, doe and a few friends of I decided that we would have a cook out with our big ole “doe” this weekend. Well, as every deer you kill, it takes a certain amount of time to prepare everything. Skinning, bonening, and now the final steps of getting the meat ready to be cooked. Well, being an active Iowawhitetail.com member for the last few days, I dug up a post from Limb Chicken about a sweet teriyaki brown sugar loin. Thinking that this is my time to try this recipe, I start the process of cleaning the loin up.
Let us back up to January 1, 2011. My good friend Muddy was able to get me a case of Templeton Rye whiskey for some of my customers. I decided that I had better keep a bottle for myself, why go through the hard work of getting it all, and not reap one benefit from any of it? So I kept this bottle on my kitchen counter, until the time was right to break it open.
Well, back to the preparation of the soon to be delicious bacon wrapped teriyaki brown sugar loin. I follow the recipe to a T, but decide since I am having a nice, cold Busch light in a bottle (also known as BL in a Bottle)I add half to the marinade, and the other half in my stomach. My dog KC, comes to the kitchen to see what is going on at this point, so I cut her a small little piece of freshly killed shed bu………..doe and she scarfs it down in mere seconds. Feeling good about myself with the meat of my freshly killed she……..”DOE” on my counter cut up, marinade ready to, just have to get the loin cleaned up, also get the rest of my shed bu……..”FREAKIN DOE” cut up, packaged up, and put in the freezer. So as I am cutting the bits and pieces of the loin that do not look consumable, I see across the counter this freshly, un-opened bottle of Templeton Rye. What a good time to celebrate!!! I pull the cork out, and pour myself a glass along with my BL in a bottle. A perfect combo to a celebratory kill of one of the best shed bu………….”UNBELIEVABLY LARGE DOE” that I have ever killed. First sip is a harsh one, it burns and taste horrible. What in the wholly living hell is this muddy character talking about this being great whiskey? I start to feel bad that I had given them out to my customers as gifts. Who would want turd juice in a bottle for gift? Man, am I a shmuck. Well, I quickly wash down the drink of Templeton Rye with a 3 to 4 big gulper of BL in a bottle, and back to the process of cutting up my enormously large, bigger than life shed doe. KC, my dog, is still standing at my ankles, well, that’s because she’s only that tall, but she is really eyeing another piece of that doe without sheds. So I cut her another piece of it, and she gobbles it down without hesitation again.
I look back at the glass full of Templeton Rye, and think, “well, I paid this much for a case of it, better not let it all go to waste”, so I take another big pull off of the glass. Still horrible, but not quite the liquid turd juice it was earlier, but still follow it with another 3-4 big gulps of BL in a bottle to ease the pain of burning my esophagus. Dang, BL in a bottle empty, so I head to the fridge for another. Top off; time to get serious about cutting up my shedded doe buck button thing to eat tomorrow at our cookout. So I grab the knife and start cutting up the first loin of my shedded button doe, when my dog KC is at my ankle again whining wanting just one more bite of what must be the greatest shedded doe buck in the world. So I cut her another piece, and she waste no time in consuming the much bigger piece than I had really anticipated on cutting for her.
As I look up from cutting the piece of, well I think it’s a damn deer, I see a half full glass of Templeton Rye, just sitting there. So, what the hell, I better go ahead and keep drinking the stuff, it’s kind of expensive. I take a bigger drink now than I have in the last 2 drinks, and what is this? It’s got kind of a slow burn, but it really isn’t the same turd juice that I started out drinking. It’s actually quite good, but still has a bit of a burn to it. I basically finish the freshly opened BL in a bottle, then head to the fridge for another one. At this point I know I have to get down to business on cleaning up my shedded doe buck button cow to have a cook out tomorrow. So I grab the knife once again, and this time my thoughts fill my head of Fishbonker standing in front of a room full of DNR officers, telling them how baiting deer in the state of Iowa is going to kill the entire herd. I just can’t get over the silliness of the dang Bonker DNR. Who do they think they are? Telling me I can’t feed cattle. I swear. The furiousness causes me to drink the rest of the Temple…what ever the hell that stuff is called in the glass, and pretty well kill the next BL in a bottle. Now I will say this, the more you drink that Templetation stuff, the better it gets. It’s wonderful, and the burn at the end is just a reward from drinking it. I head to the fridge to get another BL in a bottle (how many is it now?) and pour myself another glass of Tempenlationous. I was cutting up pork chops for some reason, but the thoughts of Bonker out shooting shed bucks over mountain Lion bait just had me furious, so I grab the glass of light tan liquid and have a big, and I mean big gulp of it. This damn brown rat looking thing is standing at my ankle wanting something, but I’ll be danged if it’s getting my BL in a bottle or my Temptation right, so I cut a piece of this long read thing in front of me and throw it out side, to see if it would follow it.
Well, I’m no exterminator, but dang that was easy. Cut a piece of red squishy stuff on the counter, and throw it outside and they will follow. Now that the rat thing is gone, I head back to the kitchen to finish what I had started, to call the state of Iowa’s Governor and tell him how the farm Beauru is the devil and they want to get rid of every single squirrel in the state of Iowa because the dang things are eaten all of the dang shed buck’s horns and they (the shed bucks) are dying from it. So I proceed to get another glass of Thelptonian Rice, another BL in a bottle, cause I can’t find the other one, and get my phone out to call Fishbonker to tell him the BIA is trying to get the farm beauro to shoot all shed squirrels. I finish my glass of, well whatever this light brownish liquid is, take a big pull off of my BL in a bottle, and I grab the knife, which is lying on the kitchen counter. I really have no idea why I have this knife, and why the wife left out a perfectly good butchered beef, but I was determined to get to the bottom of it. As I head into the living room to tell my wife how she is going to have to go clean the dang kitchen, she meets me half way. I say to her in my meanest voice, “shou has a bee’s in the dayed gomed kifishin, and shou neeb to pat it to mambujers”. I get the, “go to hell look, and a slap (which only happens when I really screw up) and she tells me to get back to taking care of my shed bu………..”doe”. Well, who does she think she is, I’ll show her, I’ll throw it outside where that giant rat thing is, and it will eat it up. So that’s what I do and head to bed mad. That will teach that red headed mean woman. Into a hardcore sleep I head.
As I type this, I have possibly the worst headache that a human being has experienced, I can’t find my deer that I shot, and my dog is nowhere to be seen. My wife won’t speak to me, not sure why, but she says I better get to looking for "her" dog. So the whole reason behind this is, I am reaching out looking for help to find my dog KC. She is a small tan and black dog, answers to her name, and really loves ham. If I could get any leads on this, I could just save my marriage in time to finish out deer season, and start shed hunting still married. Thank you for your help.
P.S. If anyone is missing a bottle of Templeton Rye, it is in my kitchen, half drank. I don’t drink the stuff, but hear that it is some good stuff from my friend Muddy.
This is all in good fun, and no Skip, I didn't shoot a shed buck. I think as of lately, we all need a little laughter in our life.
Let us back up to January 1, 2011. My good friend Muddy was able to get me a case of Templeton Rye whiskey for some of my customers. I decided that I had better keep a bottle for myself, why go through the hard work of getting it all, and not reap one benefit from any of it? So I kept this bottle on my kitchen counter, until the time was right to break it open.
Well, back to the preparation of the soon to be delicious bacon wrapped teriyaki brown sugar loin. I follow the recipe to a T, but decide since I am having a nice, cold Busch light in a bottle (also known as BL in a Bottle)I add half to the marinade, and the other half in my stomach. My dog KC, comes to the kitchen to see what is going on at this point, so I cut her a small little piece of freshly killed shed bu………..doe and she scarfs it down in mere seconds. Feeling good about myself with the meat of my freshly killed she……..”DOE” on my counter cut up, marinade ready to, just have to get the loin cleaned up, also get the rest of my shed bu……..”FREAKIN DOE” cut up, packaged up, and put in the freezer. So as I am cutting the bits and pieces of the loin that do not look consumable, I see across the counter this freshly, un-opened bottle of Templeton Rye. What a good time to celebrate!!! I pull the cork out, and pour myself a glass along with my BL in a bottle. A perfect combo to a celebratory kill of one of the best shed bu………….”UNBELIEVABLY LARGE DOE” that I have ever killed. First sip is a harsh one, it burns and taste horrible. What in the wholly living hell is this muddy character talking about this being great whiskey? I start to feel bad that I had given them out to my customers as gifts. Who would want turd juice in a bottle for gift? Man, am I a shmuck. Well, I quickly wash down the drink of Templeton Rye with a 3 to 4 big gulper of BL in a bottle, and back to the process of cutting up my enormously large, bigger than life shed doe. KC, my dog, is still standing at my ankles, well, that’s because she’s only that tall, but she is really eyeing another piece of that doe without sheds. So I cut her another piece of it, and she gobbles it down without hesitation again.
I look back at the glass full of Templeton Rye, and think, “well, I paid this much for a case of it, better not let it all go to waste”, so I take another big pull off of the glass. Still horrible, but not quite the liquid turd juice it was earlier, but still follow it with another 3-4 big gulps of BL in a bottle to ease the pain of burning my esophagus. Dang, BL in a bottle empty, so I head to the fridge for another. Top off; time to get serious about cutting up my shedded doe buck button thing to eat tomorrow at our cookout. So I grab the knife and start cutting up the first loin of my shedded button doe, when my dog KC is at my ankle again whining wanting just one more bite of what must be the greatest shedded doe buck in the world. So I cut her another piece, and she waste no time in consuming the much bigger piece than I had really anticipated on cutting for her.
As I look up from cutting the piece of, well I think it’s a damn deer, I see a half full glass of Templeton Rye, just sitting there. So, what the hell, I better go ahead and keep drinking the stuff, it’s kind of expensive. I take a bigger drink now than I have in the last 2 drinks, and what is this? It’s got kind of a slow burn, but it really isn’t the same turd juice that I started out drinking. It’s actually quite good, but still has a bit of a burn to it. I basically finish the freshly opened BL in a bottle, then head to the fridge for another one. At this point I know I have to get down to business on cleaning up my shedded doe buck button cow to have a cook out tomorrow. So I grab the knife once again, and this time my thoughts fill my head of Fishbonker standing in front of a room full of DNR officers, telling them how baiting deer in the state of Iowa is going to kill the entire herd. I just can’t get over the silliness of the dang Bonker DNR. Who do they think they are? Telling me I can’t feed cattle. I swear. The furiousness causes me to drink the rest of the Temple…what ever the hell that stuff is called in the glass, and pretty well kill the next BL in a bottle. Now I will say this, the more you drink that Templetation stuff, the better it gets. It’s wonderful, and the burn at the end is just a reward from drinking it. I head to the fridge to get another BL in a bottle (how many is it now?) and pour myself another glass of Tempenlationous. I was cutting up pork chops for some reason, but the thoughts of Bonker out shooting shed bucks over mountain Lion bait just had me furious, so I grab the glass of light tan liquid and have a big, and I mean big gulp of it. This damn brown rat looking thing is standing at my ankle wanting something, but I’ll be danged if it’s getting my BL in a bottle or my Temptation right, so I cut a piece of this long read thing in front of me and throw it out side, to see if it would follow it.
Well, I’m no exterminator, but dang that was easy. Cut a piece of red squishy stuff on the counter, and throw it outside and they will follow. Now that the rat thing is gone, I head back to the kitchen to finish what I had started, to call the state of Iowa’s Governor and tell him how the farm Beauru is the devil and they want to get rid of every single squirrel in the state of Iowa because the dang things are eaten all of the dang shed buck’s horns and they (the shed bucks) are dying from it. So I proceed to get another glass of Thelptonian Rice, another BL in a bottle, cause I can’t find the other one, and get my phone out to call Fishbonker to tell him the BIA is trying to get the farm beauro to shoot all shed squirrels. I finish my glass of, well whatever this light brownish liquid is, take a big pull off of my BL in a bottle, and I grab the knife, which is lying on the kitchen counter. I really have no idea why I have this knife, and why the wife left out a perfectly good butchered beef, but I was determined to get to the bottom of it. As I head into the living room to tell my wife how she is going to have to go clean the dang kitchen, she meets me half way. I say to her in my meanest voice, “shou has a bee’s in the dayed gomed kifishin, and shou neeb to pat it to mambujers”. I get the, “go to hell look, and a slap (which only happens when I really screw up) and she tells me to get back to taking care of my shed bu………..”doe”. Well, who does she think she is, I’ll show her, I’ll throw it outside where that giant rat thing is, and it will eat it up. So that’s what I do and head to bed mad. That will teach that red headed mean woman. Into a hardcore sleep I head.
As I type this, I have possibly the worst headache that a human being has experienced, I can’t find my deer that I shot, and my dog is nowhere to be seen. My wife won’t speak to me, not sure why, but she says I better get to looking for "her" dog. So the whole reason behind this is, I am reaching out looking for help to find my dog KC. She is a small tan and black dog, answers to her name, and really loves ham. If I could get any leads on this, I could just save my marriage in time to finish out deer season, and start shed hunting still married. Thank you for your help.
P.S. If anyone is missing a bottle of Templeton Rye, it is in my kitchen, half drank. I don’t drink the stuff, but hear that it is some good stuff from my friend Muddy.
This is all in good fun, and no Skip, I didn't shoot a shed buck. I think as of lately, we all need a little laughter in our life.
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Still hunting shed does at 9:00 ??